Freedom of speech

They welcomed home one of men killed in the attack over a week ago. Thanks to wonderful ladies on facebook they showed some pictures. I let my raw emotion take over and I just cried. Why am I struggling with this? I didn't know them, in fact I didn't even know their wives. But I guess in my head I think this could have been us. What if I was preparing to bury Troy? What if it was me trying to explain to my sweet little boys that Daddy was now in heaven? What if it was me knowing that I would have to go forward with out my best friend? I think part of me too knows that these men stories will never really be told.

So why am I posting about this again? Well, something happened today that infuriated me. Friday night is my date night with the boys. I took them to McDonalds (we found out they have star war toys in the happy meals) and I knew Hinckley would be in heaven. So we get our food and sit down in the play area and there is a couple there with their 2 kids and I thought good its not too busy. I get anxiety in these stupid play areas, really I do. Well, just as we were sitting down this father came in with five kids. He sits next to the couple sitting there and then his wife/girlfriend/whoever comes in with one other kid. None of the kids had shoes on, their clothes were all dirty, faces all dirty, they looked like punks wearing wife beaters and stuff. A worker comes in and she is passing out some free sample for a drink thats when I realized these people didn't have any food at their table and all they were doing was taking the free samples. I thought that was a bit odd but whatever.

The thing that TICKED ME OFF was the father who came in with the 5 kids only knew one word. It started with F and ended in K. Now I understand that I can't protect my kids all the time but when we are in a kid place and all you can say is the F bomb I had 2 choices... Tell him to shut his mouth DUH HELLO WE ARE IN A PUBLIC PLACE WITH KIDS or LEAVE. Considering he had gang related tattoos all over his face, arms, and body I decided to leave. I am not even kidding the only word out of this guys mouth was the F word. I couldn't believe it. I was mad he interrupted my date night with my kids. I was mad he couldn't keep his chaps from not flapping. I was mad that he was there and not my husband. Why is my husband over in Iraq fighting for your freedom to say explicit things in front of my kids? Not only did he have a foul mouth but the whole group had potty mouths and all they wanted to talk about was sex. I think we sat there for a total of 5 minutes and we couldn't get out of there faster.

So why does this guy get to come to my country and speak his dirty fifthly mouth at McDonalds while my husband is off to war? URGH!

Stupid people with stupid potty mouths....

Busy as a bumblebee

I know I have been MIA lately. There is good reason though.... Really... I have been so incredibly busy! Last week I babysat 6 extra kids... Yes that means there was 9 of us partying it up a week ago. We really had a good time. No pictures though sorry, I dont have permission to pick pictures up of them. Then this week I babysat 4 extra kids all under the age of 5! Yes there was 6 kids all 4 and UNDER! IT WAS NUTSO, CRAZY! CRAZY! But it has been good to be busy. I just have lacked in other areas.

Hinckley started swim lessons this week too. Sometimes I struggle putting him in swim lesson because he is always ahead of everybody else in the class. But he enjoys it I think.

Love this pic!
He started off on the little diving board but graduated to the bigger one next!
No fear!

I have been wanting to post this rant about something for almost a week now. Something happened a week ago close to where Troy is located (he wouldn't tell me how close but he did rub shoulders with some of the guys who were killed)... Something HORRIBLE... Something TRAGIC. 5 count them 5 USA military members were killed in Iraq. I was at karate with Hinckley when my dad called me. My dad RARELY calls me. So I picked it up and the first words out of his mouth were, "Have you heard from Troy today." I had received in an email earlier in the day so I said yes. He then said, "Good because 5 military members were killed today in Baghdad." My heart sank. For a split second I looked in on my sweet and precious little boy doing something he loves and wonder if I would have to tell him his daddy did not make it home. Then I had a reassuring feeling that Troy was alright. But my heart still hurt. Thinking about those 5 families who would be receiving that dreaded, eerie knock on the door and the news that tragedy had happen and that their loved one had died a hero.

I was anxious to get home to see what the news was reporting. To my surprise I saw a 15 second segment on the National nightly news about it. That was it... 15 seconds. How could you only give 15 seconds to these heroes? Are you kidding me? They were too worried about what celebrity got a DUI the day before, what kind of dress Michelle Obama was wearing to some cocktail hour. Don't get me wrong I think Michelle Obama has great fashion but really? 15 seconds?

So I decided to try my luck at google, cnn.com, foxnews.com, yahoo.com, msn.com.... NO LUCK. I could find NOTHING ON IT. I cried. Why on earth is this not BIG NEWS? Why do these families have to suffer the consequences of this war with no spotlight except the fact that their loved ones wouldn't make it home alive? Shouldn't we rally as a country and wrap our arms around these sweet families who are going through hell? The decision of which casket to purchase, what burial plot to pick, a head stone, who would do the service, would they have to worry about protesters? I haven't even discussed the healing emotional, physical, spiritual side of it. Did any of these soldiers have kids? Wives? Husbands? Sisters? Brothers? Best friends? Mothers? Fathers? I want to know about these HEROIC people who died for my freedom. IS THAT too much to ask?!

I have found an amazing website that gives you info on all the soldiers who are killed overseas. I am so glad I found it!

OKAY OKAY RANT OVER FOR NOW.

Pet Peeves

So I just want to vent for a minute.

1. I can not stand when I see people on motorcycles with NO HELMETS. Even more peeved when I see a guy with a girl on the back with no helmet. If you are stupid enough to get on a motorcycle be safe for goodness sake!

2. I think it is freaky when people put HUGE GIGANTIC flowers on their baby girls head. I think it looks weird. Maybe that will change if I have a girl of my own but I just do not see putting a flower bigger than Texas on a babys head.

3. Why can't Jimmer just be dead on like all the time? Why is he hot, hot, hot one night and the next a let down? URGH! Come on BYU basketball!

Okay the end for now.

Just doesn't make sense

So I guess I should clarify my statement do I think war is worth the cost. In some aspects I do. Do I believe in this Iraq war, NO! I think it is time for us to get out. Do I think it is worth all the lives lost on both sides? NO! DO I think we need to meddle in everyones business? NO!

But I do have to say it is worth it for me right now that we will be completely debt free and a nice savings account. And that my family has health insurance. And I get to be a stay at home mom.

Okay now that I have clarified that a bit on to my rant...

It's been no secret that Troy (and myself) have struggled with weight. The only difference is my job doesn't depend on it. Troys job does! Let me explain, according to the army Troy is suppose to weigh 211 pounds. Well, if you know my husband well that will NEVER HAPPEN. He has way too much muscle to weigh 211 pounds. Did you see my video of him pulling the MRAP? Since he is over that weight he is flagged. Meaning he can not receive promotions, ribbons, etc. He is up for promotion and some awards too but will not receive them because of his flag. I do not agree with that because I feel that if you earned the dang award or promotion you deserve it.

NOW. HERE IS THE KICKER. What really REALLY REALLY pisses me off and yes I am using that strong of a word is this. Now I can understand the not passing weight, really I can. But if a solider can PASS the PT test there should be NO question on whether or not they should be allowed in the army. Now I am not talking just passing the PT test I mean PASSING IT WITH FLYING COLORS. He has NEVER NOT passed the PT test.

So a few things have come out this week from the head retards there. And yes if this all happens we are going to every news network and talk show that will take us and it will be a good story that will get a lot of attention.

1. That if the soldiers are not within height/weight measurements by the time they get back to Idaho this fall those soldiers will be DISHONORABLY DISCHARGED. Do you know what it means to be dishonorably discharged? Well, let me tell you. You will never be able to work for the government and every application or job you apply for anywhere you have to say you were discharged and of course there is no explanation so for all they know you could have been given to boot because you killed somebody. So there goes just about every job.

2. You have to pay back any or all bonus you received. Ummm... NO. Troy earned that. You are NOT going to take that away.

3. Even though my husband will have spent 16 months away from his family in a country that HATES Americans, putting his life on the line every FREAKING DAY he will receive no awards or ribbons. It will be like he never even served overseas. Now majority of the guys who are over there with Troy never leave the wire. Troy and a a few other guys do often. They go in unsafe territory a lot. HE deserves every award and ribbon he earns there.

So let me put his perspective. Out of 12 guys in Troys section only 2 passed the last PT test. Troy and this kid Brighton. 2/12 but guess who will receive their promotions and awards? THE KIDS WHO DIDN'T PASS THE FREAKING PT BUT WHO LOOK THE PART. Not my husband who ran a 5K in 23 minutes. Or who can bench press 350 pounds... Its the kid who if in a real situation had to run a mile with a 180 pound injured kid on his back would have to take a cigarette break and fall out 50 feet into it.

I think if a kid can't pass PT then kick them out after a certain time. But if they are passing the PT and passing it well. LEAVE THEM ALONE and their family!

So we may have a huge fight ahead of us. But I believe we will cause some waves. I just do not understand it. I am just thankful I have my best friend next to me to go through it together.

Head Spinning

So I have so many things on my mind tonight. I have sat down to write on my blog 3 times this week but the second I sit down to type my brain goes dead.

I posted something almost a week ago about letting go of friendships. I should let you know that I was not talking about anybody who would read this blog. I have deleted it because I had many emails/phone calls making sure I wasn't talking about them. I did not intend to hurt feelings or offend anybody. I am so sorry if any of you took this personally.

My head is still spinning with my calling in Young Womens. I have AMAZING GIRLS. LIKE A-M-A-Z-I-N-G. I am so impressed with them. They have lifted me up without even knowing it.

Recently, I've had the opportunity to reconnect with a few friends that are going through some really hard times. YOU NEVER KNOW WHAT PEOPLE ARE GOING THROUGH! If you have a feeling to email/call/text or visit a friend DO IT! Five, yes five of my dear friends are going through horrible, hard times. Each one have been on my mind. I have prayed for them and will continue to do so. All I have to say is I love you. If you are reading this and you are going through a difficult time right now be it a divorce, a miscarriage, a broken engagement, a loss of a loved one, an unfaithful spouse, a car accident, an abusive relationship, or whatever it may be, I AM HERE FOR YOU NIGHT AND DAY.

I know you are probably tired of me saying I miss my husband but I do. Really if you lived with me or near me you would never guess that I am struggling with him gone. I guess I just pick my blog readers to vent to, SORRY! I have come to a great conclusion though about my beautiful family. I am so blessed to have a wonderful supportive husband and 2 beautiful children.

When Hinckley was little like I am talking when he was a baby people seemed to be drawn to him. We would have complete strangers come up to him and want to hold him (even in Idaho where there is baby city). Because of a special blessing Troy and I received I knew Hinckley was going to be a special person. I knew he was destined for greatness. I would have come to that conclusion as his mother but hearing it from somebody else it changes things a bit. I only know of one person that we have come in contact with who thinks Hinckley is less than special, but I really dont care what she thinks someday she will come to her senses. Since we have moved to New Mexico we've had some really neat experiences here regarding my little missionary Hinckley. Someday I will share them with you. He really is something special and people know and love him and that makes this mommy happy.

Chandler has a very unique draw to him. Instead of his knowledge and love it's his red hair that attracts people to him. Just like my Hinckley they meet him once and they dont forget him. So many people know him by his hair. I can't explain it but it means so much as a mom for people around me to love my children. To accept them and love them and find joy being around them. I love that people are impressed with them and have no problem telling me I have great kids. Because I know I have great kids but some days are hard. Being a single parent is HARD. Living without your husband is HARD. But when you get to snuggle in bed with them and read your favorite childhood book over and over again.... its priceless. Even if your one year old toots in your face and your four year old tells me I skipped a page or too just to get the reading done faster!

OH HOW I LOVE MY BOYS.

Next post... Valentine's day!

Intense Soccer

We did soccer in Idaho and we had such a great experience we decided to sign Hinckley up here in Arizona. Its still in the 100's during the day here! We loved his coach there in Idaho and I was really nervous about the soccer program here. Especially when his coach told me they were practicing 2-3 times a week plus a game. But I have actually LOVED the coach and team here. I have made some great friends with the other moms and Hinckley has loved every minute of it.

Well, Hinks had his first soccer game on Friday night and his team won! But I have to tell you the coach for the other team was SO INTENSE ABOUT THE GAME. So much in fact that he has taught his kids to play rough and not by the rules. For example in this league and age group you are not allowed to have a goalie. Well, what does this coach do? Puts in a goalie! i know it may not sound like a big deal but it really was. The goals are not very big in the first place and this kid was kicking and hitting our players every time we got close enough. Then this other kid was taught that every time he kicked the ball he should slide there fore knocking down 2 or 3 other players with him. Another kid was pulling hair, kicking and punching our kids. In fact one time this kid knocked Hinckley right in the head. I ABOUT LOST IT RIGHT THEN AND THERE. I talked with the ref who was only like 14 years old and he told me that he had told the coach 3 times to cool it. And of course the coach didn't listen so we had to go talk to the commissioner of the league. From my understanding this commissioner is really laid back and stuff so I doubt anything will come of it. And our main coach who would have stood up for the kids was on vacation and if he was there I think he would have had a nice chat with that coach.

It just made me sad in the end. I went from complete ANGER to Sadness to thankfulness. I was thankful Hinckley didn't have a coach that played dirty. I really hope the next few games go better. We only have 3 left until we moved. It makes me sad for Hinckley to leave so early in the season but there is nothing we can do!

Yard Sale Honesty

2 weekends ago we had a yard sale. It took hours upon hours to get everything sorted and tagged with a price. Not to mention the time to set it up in the morning (thank you 4am wake up call) and the advertising. $20 for the newspaper I think is a little excessive. PLUS we only had like 15 cars come. AND I put signs EVERYWHERE. Coming from both sides of the highway and from in town. Oh and POSTED it on craigslist and BYUI bulletin board. We did make some money but man for all that work and to have people come and pay 25 cents for something you marked $2 is sure frustrating. Now I have been out yard selling before and I know people just sell JUNK. But I wasn't selling anything that was broken, misleading or anything. We sold a dvd player that the remote didn't work and I told them straight out it didn't work and that it probably just needs new batteries. My conclusion? I NEVER WANT TO DO A YARD SALE AGAIN IN MY LIFE! Just give stuff away to people. I felt better about my 4 VAN LOADS of stuff I dropped off at the thrift store than my $600 in my pocket from selling stuff.

25 degrees= No coats?

(Not my kid but you better believe this is what they look like when we go outside!)


Here is a vent post. SORRY! But I just can't handle it any more. I can NOT believe how many kids and even SOME BABIES who do not have coats or hats on outside. Are you just aching for sickness? Even on facebook I have seen pictures of babies who have no clothes on yes they are inside but its still drafty and cold in a house even if the heater is 75 degrees. I know this sounds bad but majority of the time I keep Chandler in his NICE WARM FLEECE JAMMIES. You want to know why? Because socks always fall off of him and his hands get cold if he is wearing clothes. So PJ's it is my friends because they are warm. AND ITS FREEZING OUTSIDE. Ok I feel better now. BUNDLE UP YOUR KIDS!

Craigslist idiot

We posted a TI-84 calculator online to craigslist.org. And to much of my excitement we heard from somebody within a few hours. However, when I opened the email I was disappointed... This lady asked if we would take $30 LESS THAN the price we were asking for. UM.... HELLO? Like seriously? Now we have done our fair share of buying and selling online and HONESTLY WE HAVE NEVER EVER LOW balled somebody. We have ALWAYS given them the price they asked for. And every time I list something online people ALWAYS low ball you. I hate the saying, "well I only have $40 to spend". Well, then you aren't in the market for this item.
So I email this lady back and say sorry we will not accept that price. I go on with my day and its nap time. Hinckley and I are sleeping out cold in my bed and the home phone rings (mind you my parents and Troys parents and a few friends are the ONLY ones who have this number). I pick up really fast so Hinckley doesn't wake up and I hang up. Then the phone rings again (same thing pick up hang up), THEN THE STUPID LADY CALLS ME AGAIN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! And I noticed it said City of Idaho Falls on it and I panicked and thought maybe Troy had been an accident or something. So by this time Hinckley is up, I am half out of it but PISST. And the lady is like, "Hello is this Bethany Carter?" I am like yes this is she. And she says, "well you and I have been corresponding through email, and I just looked up your number". LOOKED UP MY NUMBER? ARE YOU SOME PYSCHO? How the heck did this lady know who I was? I used the craigslist "secret code" email and everything. Even when I emailed her I didn't use my name at all. Then she asks how low are you willing to go? See because my son is in school and he has a wife and a kid... I SHOULD HAVE SAID WELL YOU KNOW WHAT LADY? MY HUSBAND IS IN SCHOOL AND HE HAS A WIFE A KID AND A BABY DUE IN 4 weeks! So you wanna play that card BRING IT THE FREAK ON! I told her I had to talk to my husband and I would get back to her. Then she is like well I am leaving work soon so here is my cell number.
I haven't responded to her because I AM STILL PISST she called me at home. I actually FULL on expected her to show up at my door. I told Troy I was going to carry the gun around with me in the house because I don't know this lady. We live in Idaho but we have CRAZYS who live in IDAHO TOO.
Plus we've had many other emails. But how the heck did she find out who I was? Thats what the freaky thing is.

Pregnant=ANNOYED

So tonight I have come to the conclusion that I am a very annoyed person. I let the small things bug the heck out of me. Okay, I really think it may just be a pregnancy thing but man people are driving me nuts!


Tonight we had enrichment and they said they were serving dinner and to come with an empty stomach. Well, they didn't serve "dinner" until 8pm! UMMM HELLO? Dont have people show up at 6:30 with an empty stomach (which they specifically told us to do) and not feed them for an hour and a half. ESPECIALLY PREGNANT WOMEN!!!!!!!! I couldn't even pay attention to anything that was said because I was so dang hungry. And should I even count how many pregnant women were there. I can think of 6 right now off the top of my head NOT including me.

So then after we finally ate all the kids were let loose and they were RUNNING AROUND LIKE CHICKEN WITH THEIR HEADS CUT OFF! UGH! Are you serious moms? You are just going to ignore the increase in volume?




Can i just say that drivers in Eastern Idaho SUCK! Everything from the lack of turn signal to the riding your bumper in the right hand lane when they can perfectly pass you on the left.

And I really really really HATE the policies of BYU-Idaho. Like you seriously have to have my husband IN person at the cashiers office to give you permission to allow his wife to do anything with his account, like say PAY FREAKIN TUITION. I even woke Hinckley up from his nap, put pants and shoes on because I was afraid they wouldn't allow me on campus with shorts and flip flops never mind the fact that its 95 degrees outside and I am 7 1/2 months pregnant! And to drive the 20 minutes north just to be told my husband has to do it. OH HECK NO!

Dont even get me started on anything else... Like waiting 20 minutes to drop off a 24 hours PEE sample at the hospital. When the lady is sitting right there and ALL I have to do is hand it over to her. I literally waited 20 minutes for this lady to take the dang gallon of pee off my hands. Speaking of this 24 hr pee sample thats a WHOLE OTHER POST.

Here's another one. So we decided to rent some movies from the library. We got them RIGHT BEFORE they closed. Brought them home and both of them were so scratched we couldn't watch but 30 minutes of them. So I returned them when today and explained that we were not able to watch them and they should be aware that other people will have the same problem. Then the woman proceeds to drill me on if i scratched the dang DVDs. Are you serious? I've had them in my possession for like 14 hours and out of those 14 hours we were asleep like 9 of them. Do you think if I scratched them to hell and back I would really be this honest with you?


Okay... I think I am done. I have a few more vents but I am feeling better already. I think I need a job at doing demolition or something to get my stress out!

The sun is shinning!

Well, I have come to the conclusion that people suck. In the last few months I have realized that 2 of my friends are what I would like to say "users". The only reason why they are your friend is to make them feel better. Does that make any sense? Anyway, that was random.

On the up side it is starting to get nice here. At least in the 40's! Hinckley and I went on a walk today to the park and it was so fun! I am so anxious for it to get warmer!

Troy has less than a month left in school for the semester! Hopefully he will be able to find a job for the summer. He will have army training this summer and we might be going to Orlando for a week.

Not much else to report. The family is good!

Community care not so caring?

Here it goes a vent post! I will try to make it short and simple but I am SURE frustrated! Troy went to Community Care in Rigby on Dec. 7th 2007. He was out running in our neighborhood and rolled his ankle and to be on the safe side we took him in to get it checked over. Our good friends the Webbers watched Hinckley for us so he wouldn't get sick and off we went. They did an x-ray and gave him a splint and thats about it. Thankfully it was not worse. They said they would bill it to our insurance which was about a $100. We didn't hear anything for a while so we thought it was all taken care of, in fact I called and they said they were waiting to hear back from insurance. Well, then in April 2008 before Troy left for BCT we got a letter in the mail saying we owed the full amount plus 4 months of interest. I was like... what? So we called and they said they would re-file it with the insurance. Again, we didn't hear from them for a period of 4 months. In August we got another bill with even more interest added to it. So Troy called again and he found out that they were billing the wrong insurance. I understand that mistake but I know without a shadow of DOUBT in my mind I gave them TROYS INSURANCE card that night and they told me oh we have it on file and I asked if it was the correct insurance and they said yes. Anyway.... So they billed the new insurance which is good because they only have 1 year to file it. Well, the next month and every month since we have received a bill. Well they kept sending it to this random insurance and then to the insurance who they were suppose to but the random insurance wouldn't accept it. WELL DUH HELLO we told you we DO NOT HAVE THAT INSURANCE. Then they started trying to bill our new insurance which is through the military instead of the insurance we ACTUALLY had. What the crap? So finally in Jan and whole year and 1 month after the fact Troy called our old insurance and they said yes we will cover the whole thing as long as they send a EOB. An EOB is an explanation of benefits so they know we had NO other insurance than this one. Well they said they would immediately. Well, low and behold we get another bill this month and Troy was fit to be tied!

So he called them the other day and I heard the entire conversation and this girl kept saying I dont understand why you are yelling at me this is not my fault. And Troy kept saying OVER AND OVER AND OVER again that he was not yelling and that he was just frustrated with the situation and he understood that it was not her fault but somebody was to blame because this paper was NOT sent to our insurance like it should have been. Then she was like well we bill insurance as a courtesy... Well dang let me file it then. Anyway... to make a long story even longer she kept accusing him of being mean to her. Now I know Troy can get really heated... trust me I have seen it. But not once did he use any foul language or raise his voice other than the fact that he was frustrated but nothing like yelling.

Well, today in the mail we got this letter from the head doctor saying we are no longer welcome at any of the community cares and how he didn't appreciate the verbal abuse received by one of his staff. Verbal abuse? are you kidding me? You are a doctor do you even know what verbal abuse is? We have been trying to clear this up for 1 year and almost 3 months... can we say we are a bit frustrated with the situation?!!!!!!!!!! At least we are trying to clear it up.

Let me tell you another story that happened to me a few months ago. I had gone to community care for something and there were only 2 of us in there. A Hispanic man (who could not speak any English) and me. Nobody else in the waiting room and nobody in back. They took the man before me, he was there first but I got out first. When I walked up to the desk the lady didn't even look up and she said, "Oh you don't have to worry about the bill today it is taken care of". I was like, "what? I need to pay my co-pay" And she looked u and said OH I thought you were somebody else. Well there was nobody out in the waiting room. Who else could have been? So some person who cant even SPEAK ENGLISH who doesn't even HAVE insurance gets of scotch free?

Anyway... we are talking to our friend who is lawyer not because we are SUE happy we just want it resolved. It is now a bill over $300 and if they think for one second they are getting a DIME out of me they are smoking crack.

NOT interested... Thank you!

I have decided to write a blog about the endless opportunities I receive to "start my own business", "host a party", "earn 35% off product", etc. I am so SICK AND TIRED OF hearing this crap over and over and over again. I AM NOT interested in hosting a party or skin care class, I AM NOT interested in becoming a team member or consultant, and I AM NOT interested in your product. To all those out there who may be a part of some company congrats to you but leave me out of it! I hate being put in a situation where I first feel obligated to come and bring a friend so I can get a free cheesy gift. Second I HATE feeling obligated to buy the expensive product to help a friend get their business up and running or whatever. THIRD I HATE being asked if I am interested in hosting this or that or becoming a team player. NO> NO> NO> NO> NO> Let me give you a list of parties I have been to in the last 3 years...
*Quixtar
*Modbe
*Mary Kay
*Arbonne
*Some spa thing
*Stamp it up
*Scrap booking galore
*some candle thing
*Some AT HOME decoration crap
*and a few decal parties

So you know I am done with parties. I am done with this at home crap. Thanks but NO thanks.

Things are changing out there... You'll like it!

For the first time since giving birth to Hinckley I have finally come to the phase in my life that I thought I would never get to. I want another one! It sounds crazy but its true! I really struggled being Hinckleys mom he was a very demanding baby. We lived with my parents for the first 6 months he was born and it took all 4 of us to things going. We would all takes shifts. We had doctor appointment after doctor appointment and all sorts of tests and such. Honest and truly that is one part of my life I NEVER NEVER want to revisit. My son was diagnosed with acid reflux which many moms have told me oh yeah my kid had the same thing. NOT! Did you have to take your 3 month old baby to a specialist and have them put your newborn under why they stuck a tube with a camera down his throat and sample his acid? I DONT THINK SO! I have only met one other person who has experienced what I did with my son. And then did you have the doctor tell you that your son stomach was near unrepair? I DONT THINK SO! Was your kid on 4 different medicines at one time to stop the acid from forming? Probably not. Does you kid still have problems and he is almost 2?

Okay so now that I have vented... I thought I would never want to experience it again. But something deep down inside is changing. On Sunday I held this newborn baby who is about 6 weeks old and she was just adorable! By 2 weeks hinckley was already kicking and screaming and from that time forward we never sat in church. We were always walking the halls. It is actually a miracle if you ask me. There have been many times I have told Heavenly Father look I can never have any more kids, i am not cut out for this mom job. But you know maybe its not to bad... I realized that I can do it.

I want to experience a newborn baby who actually sleeps more than 20 mins at a time. I literally had to sleep sitting up with him on my chest for most of Hinckleys first 6 months because if I would lay him down the acid would just kick up and he would scream and scream and scream.

So I am proclaiming to the world something I thought I would never do again. I WANNA A BABY! How exciting is that? Babies R US here I come.... Troy watch out! LOL!